


Something Wicked This Way Comes

by FlorenceRose



Category: Yandere Simulator (Video Game)
Genre: Amai is too pure for this world, Angst for days, Bullying, Denial of Feelings, Implied Shin/Amai friendship, Kizana/Oka friendship, M/M, Murder-Suicide, Oka is beautiful I love her, Oka knows what's up, Self Harm, Shin and Oka are friendship goals, Shin is Not Gay™, Shin is a sarcastic dork, Torture, Toxic friendship, awareness of ayano, budo/oka/shin friendship, kizana is amazing i love her, too many memes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-10
Updated: 2017-04-06
Packaged: 2018-10-02 05:41:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10210811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlorenceRose/pseuds/FlorenceRose
Summary: Mysterious things are afoot at Akademi High. Three girls have gone missing in three weeks, and Oka is afraid that she will be the fourth. Meanwhile, Shin Higaku is trying to quell his best friend's paranoia while also befriending the fiendishly handsome Budo Masuta, who he definitely is only interested in platonically. Because Shin is Not Gay™. When a catastrophic event leaves Shin reeling, who is he supposed to trust - the final words of his best friend, his better judgement or the claims of his hysterical classmates?





	1. In which Oka is afraid of being murdered

**Author's Note:**

> Please forgive the awful summary, title and content of this story. It's my first attempt at fanfiction since my FF.Net days (which we do NOT speak of) so it's not all that wonderful, but I wanted to contribute something to this fandom and the Masugaku ship because it is beautiful and pure. The title will definitely be changing because, needless to say, the story has nothing to do with Macbeth.
> 
> Thanks for reading, and please leave your criticisms or praise! 
> 
> (and yes, i'm aware of how short this is... future chapters will be longer, I swear!)

Tuesday 10th March

The landscape of Shisuta Town looked like it was constructed from children’s toys from Shin and Oka’s vantage point on the school’s roof. The mismatched patchwork colours of the roofs looked to Shin like the entire town had been covered in a blanket to protect it from the freezing winter air. He found himself smiling as he envisioned the houses as dozens of shivering kittens under a quilt.  
“It’s cold today.” Oka attempted to make smalltalk as she buried herself into Shin’s side, sapping the heat from his body. “How do you manage to stay so warm?”  
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s because I sold my soul to the flame demon.” Shin’s deadpan delivery caused Oka to pull her half of Shin’s jacket over herself more tightly.  
“Do we really have to be up here?”  
“It’s the only secluded spot that isn't suspicious.” Shin replied. Upon entering the second floor’s storage closet the previous day he’d been greeted with an ominous puddle of what appeared to be blood. He wasn’t particularly keen on coming across another one, especially not with Oka.  
“Well, let’s get this over with. What did you want to tell me?” Oka asked.

 

Conversation start: 9:23 am 11/2

\- hey shin, did you have any trouble with the math hw?  
\- nah, your explanation helped a heap. thanks, you're an actual lifesaver  
\- you're too kind, man.  
\- nah, i just give credit where it’s due.

 

Message received: 10:05 pm 24/2  
“Hey, Shin. I know that a phone call isn't really the best way to communicate this, but I just wanted to tell you that I am so sorry about what happened to Amai. I know you guys were friends and I wanted to let you know that I’m here if you need anything. I mean, I’m not all that good at cooking so you're going to have to cover that yourself, but if you need to talk about the whole grief aspect feel free to give me a call. Or y’know, if you need a hug or something come on up to my club and I’ll do what I can for you. Uh, yeah. That’s it I guess. Sleep well.”

 

Conversation start: 12:03 pm 

\- is kizana sick or something?  
\- idk. i hope she hasn't just disappeared like osana did.  
\- this is getting really suspicious.

 

“It doesn't matter.” Shin said quietly. “Let’s just sit here.” His phone vibrated in his pocket, making him jump a little.  
Oka sat up abruptly. “No way, Shin. I did not come up to this goddamned roof on a freezing day just to sit with you. In case you haven’t realised, three girls’ve gone missing in three weeks! I’m not exactly keen to become the fourth. So get your ass off that bloody bench and escort me somewhere warmer. Now.”  
Shin shrugged. “Nah, I’m gonna stay for a bit.”  
Oka raised her eyebrows and clasped her hands to her chest. When she spoke, she sounded frantic. “Shin. I don't feel safe going by myself. If there’s someone behind these disappearances, which I suspect is the case, they could be anywhere right now. I don't want to die.”  
“You’re going to be fine.” Shin replied dismissively. “There’s a perfectly rational explanation for all of this.”  
“Osana disappeared, Shin! One minute she was out in the courtyard talking to everybody, and the next she was gone! Amai-“  
“Amai committed suicide, Oka. Don't try and turn it into a game of CSI.”  
“Okay, I won’t talk about Amai, then. But do you think it’s a coincidence that Kizana’s “poison” for the play was actual rat poison? Do you think it’s a coincidence that Osana went missing? Do you think it’s a coincidence that Amai died? All these girls died after admitting that they liked Taro. You know I like him, Shin. I could be next, if the person who went after them comes after me.”  
Shin sighed loudly. “Oka, you're being paranoid. Nobody is going to sneak out of the shadows and come to kill you.”  
Oka threw up her hands dramatically. “Fine, Shin. You sit here and enjoy the view, I’m going to try not to get murdered on the way home.”  
“Okay. Bye, Oka.”  
“Goodbye, Shin.”

 

Conversation start: 5:47 pm, 10/3

\- budo, can u tell oka she isn't going to get murdered  
\- shin, you know what oka’s like. she knows she's not going to get murdered  
\- i tried, she's still worried  
\- look man, theres nothing to worry about  
\- try telling her that  
\- do u have plans tonight?  
\- nah  
\- wanna see a movie? as friends of course  
\- sure

 

Conversation start: 6:30 pm, 10/3

\- sHIN  
\- I RAN INTO AYANO ON THE WAY OUT OF SCHOOL  
\- SHE LOOKED CONCERNED  
\- SHE DIDN’T FOLLOW TARO HOME  
\- I THINK SHE’S UP TO SOMETHING  
\- DO YOU THINK SHE KILLED THEM  
\- SHIN  
\- SHIN  
\- SHIN  
\- SHIN  
\- …shin?

The film Budo had chosen was of a genre that Shin liked to call “soft horror.” It was, essentially, something that tried to be scary but instead came across as try-hard and cliche.  
It didn't stop Budo from cowering in his seat, though.  
Shin wished he was joking.  
Budo honestly looked as if he were on the verge of tears. His eyes were wide and bloodshot, as if he was hardly daring to blink for fear of what was to come.  
The film was about an otherwise innocent schoolgirl killing anybody who came between her and the boy she loved. It was a cheap attempt at discount horror, complete with absent teachers and fearful students.  
Shin was sure that in the same situation he would be the one to call the police and get the girl arrested.  
“Shin!” Budo whisper-yelled.  
“What?” Shin replied. The girl sitting next to him glared and gestured at him to be quiet.  
“I’m scared.”  
Shin rolled his eyes. “That’s great, Budo. What do you want me to do, hold your hand?”  
Budo nodded.  
Shin’s heart soared and sped up its beating. Surely he’d heard wrong?  
Budo offered his hand to Shin, a look of sheer terror on his face. Shin sighed and rolled his eyes to hide his own nerves and clasped Budo’s much larger hand in his own.  
It fit nicely.  
Shin swore he could feel a kind of electricity transfer from Budo’s hand.  
Static, probably. Idiot.  
He tried not to worry about how sweaty his hand was. They sat there, in that position, for the remainder of the film.

 

Text received: 9:24 pm. 

\- shin  
\- i think there’s somebody outside my house  
\- shin im scared  
\- can u come over

 

Text received: 9:30 pm

\- dont worry it was the neighbour’s cat [!!! unable to deliver message]


	2. In which Shin has a Bad Time™

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wasn't planning on putting up another chapter so soon but here goes I guess. I'm going to try and write longer chapters in the future, I think, because these are a bit too short for me to be entirely happy with them :)  
> Oh yeah, suggestions for a new title would be awesome if anybody has any ideas. I really don't want the title of my first fic on here to be a Macbeth quote... maybe Othello would be better? Just kidding. Please no Shakespeare-related suggestions :D  
> It may also be worth mentioning that I made myself sad while writing about Amai and Kizana.  
> Let me know what you think, and thank you for reading this!

Wednesday 11th March

Shin's maths class, as usual, was insufferably boring. He'd never been all that good at math. Actually, that was a lie. He was great at math until somebody decided it was an excellent idea to introduce letters. Like, come on. It was maths, not bloody English.  
The whiteboard at the front of the room was covered in equations and graphs, and even though he'd been paying attention (well, as much as was possible), he still didn't understand any of it.  
A quick glance around the room revealed that the people sitting around him looked just as lost as he was. Saki Miyu's face was contorted into one of utter confusion, one eyebrow raised so high Shin was surprised it hadn't disappeared into her hair yet.  
Oh well. At least he wasn't alone.  
He felt his phone vibrate from inside his pocket, and he took a quick look at his teacher. She was writing another question on the board, so he figured he had about thirty seconds to check the message and reply. His heart soared as he read the "from" line. 

From: Budo Masuta, 11/3, 12:32 pm

Budo was such a good friend. Shin's heart sank in turn as he read the contents of the actual text. 

\- have you spoken to oka today?

Shin quickly typed his reply, keeping one eye on the teacher. Why was Budo asking about Oka? They were friends, too. If Budo had wanted to speak to her, he should have. 

\- no. i think she's home sick, she wasn't here this morning. why do you ask?

Budo's reply came almost straight away.

\- i know she's not here, her chair is empty. i was just wondering if you knew where she is.

Shin was ready to stow away his phone when Saki came to his rescue with a well placed question. The teacher began to write the steps up on the board.  
So many equations. Why couldn't maths just make sense, like history or Japanese or English?  
He took the opportunity to continue his conversation with Budo. 

\- she’s probably just got a cold or something. 

The door slid open and a figure stepped inside, drawing the class' attention.  
Shin's eyes met with the porcelain complexion of one of his underclassmen. Ayano. That was her name. She'd come in asking to join the Occult club the week before, but Oka hadn't been there so Shin had had to tell her to come back another time. She hadn't gone back yet.  
"Whoops, sorry, wrong classroom!" she said quickly, and turned to leave.  
Shin thought he'd glanced a red stain on her sleeve. Probably just paint. 

\- sorry for being annoying, i'm just a little on edge. 

Shin sighed at Budo's reply. Too real.  
He hadn't admitted it to anyone, but the incidences involving Osana, Amai and Kizana had seriously made him worry. Amai's more than most, of course.  
Simply thinking of her name felt like a blow to the stomach.  
It had been nearly three weeks since Midori Gurin had found Amai's shoes on the school's roof along with a note explaining herself. Amai had said that she'd been struggling with suicidal thoughts for a long time, but her cooking had helped immensely - knowing that she was able to bring joy to people through food had given her the strength to continue. But eventually everything became too much for her and she felt like she had to end it.  
Her body hadn't been found.  
The whole situation was terrible and gruesome, but Shin felt that it was made worse by the fact that he hadn't even known she was depressed.  
He inhaled deeply to prevent himself from crying.  
Osana Najimi, a close friend of one of Budo's classmates, had gone missing the week before Amai's death. Nobody had any idea where she was or if she was even alive, but Yui Rio had mentioned seeing her walk away with Ayano the morning she went missing. Nobody had seen her since.  
After Amai, there was Kizana. She had been a pale, sickly, stick-thin actress - a bloody good one, in Shin's opinion - and, while she had seemed somewhat narcissistic, Shin knew that she really wasn't. She'd been an acquaintance of Oka's, and often went to her for help with some of the various things going on in her life. She'd died onstage while playing Juliet. In the scene where she was supposed to drink the potion to make her sleep she just... dropped dead. Shin had originally thought she was acting, but the boy playing Friar Lawrence had immediately called for the curtain to be pulled and ordered for somebody to call an ambulance. The police had treated it as a murder case, but the murderer wasn't found. The only clue was that it had to be somebody subtle enough to be able to swap the original prop for rat poison while nobody was looking.  
Shin let out a shaky breath as the memories flooded back. Three girls  
in three weeks. No explanations for two of them.  
Would Oka be the next one?  
He tapped out a reply to Budo.

\- i know you are. we all are.  
\- …i'm here if you need to talk.

The rest of the class seemed to drag on forever - an endless loop of Shin trying to hold back his tears while being haunted by memories of Kizana's final moments, of Osana's bright hair, of Amai's signature chocolate cake.  
The weight of it all was almost too much to bear.

 

Conversation start 11/3 at 12:57 pm.  
\- oka, why aren't you at school? are you okay?  
\- shin, i had a dentist appointment. i told you already, didn't i?  
\- sorry, i must've forgotten. budo was scared that you'd gone missing.  
\- tell him i'm fine.  
\- will do. 

***

"Just kill me already." Osana begged as she watched her kidnapper come closer to her yet again. Anything to avoid the pain she knew was coming. It wasn't like she had anything left to live for.  
She began to shake uncontrollably. When would this end? Was this her life now? An endless cycle of waiting for the next infliction of unbearable pain?  
Shin bolted upright, his body cold with sweat. Jeez. He had to stop thinking about morbid stuff before taking naps.  
He said a quick prayer to whatever god was listening. He prayed that somehow, somewhere, Osana was safe. He prayed that Kizana’s killer would be found. He prayed that nobody else would ever feel the way Amai did before she—  
His bedroom door creaked open, making him jump. Was it Kizana’s killer? Was it Osana’s kidnapper? Was it —  
"Shin, honey, are you okay? You've been awfully quiet tonight." Mrs Higaku sat down next to her son, close enough so that he could feel the heat radiating from her body but not so close that he was forced to touch her. Shin didn't answer. His mind was still full of Amai's face during their last conversation, Kizana's sickly thin frame slipping into an Occult club meeting and Oka leaving with her, Osana's adorable attempt to make Taro lunch (which he had then told Budo all about, to his dismay. He remembered the crushed look on his friend's face upon hearing about Taro's fondness for Osana, too).  
"I'm fine, Mum. Just tired." Shin answered softly, giving his mother a weak smile.  
She sighed before replying. "Okay, honey. I'm here for you if you need me. I... I didn't know the other two girls, but if you want to talk about Amai then..."  
"I said I'm fine." Shin snapped. Guilt immediately flooded his system. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap."  
"It's okay." Mrs Higaku replied with a wan smile. "Oh yeah, I was wondering if you wanted to invite Oka and Budo over for dinner on Friday night?"  
Friday night. Dinner. Oka. Budo.  
If Oka was at his house, there was no way for her to get murdered.  
"Yes, please." he replied without further deliberation.  
Mrs Higaku gave Shin a brief, warm hug before leaving. She smelled of chamomile and warmth, and her hug left Shin feeling immediately comforted.  
His phone lit up with a notification. 

From: Oka Ruto, 11/3, 9:59 pm  
\- i think i'm going to confess to taro under the cherry tree on friday  
\- lol don't tell budo  
\- why  
\- he’d be heartbroken  
\- he doesn't like taro anymore you absolute nitwit  
\- still thought he'd be off limits. girl code and all  
\- i don't know if girl code applies to male friends  
\- probs not. go for it then.  
\- :) 

 

Oka grinned at her phone as a text came through. Her heart filled with joy upon seeing Taro Yamada's name lit up on her screen, as much as it disturbed her also.  
Perhaps he'd cast a hex on her.  
The thought aroused her slightly. 

From: Taro Yamada, 11/3, 10:01 pm

\- Haha, you're so funny, Oka. How did I not know this before?  
\- I don't know, haha :)  
\- I like you, you know. We should spend some more time together! Do you like coffee?  
\- I basically live off it :P

From: Osoro Shidesu, 11/3, 10:02 pm  
\- hey, demon girl. just thought u'd wanna know that aishi was asking bout u today. wanted to know where you hang out n shit.  
\- Oh. That's a little concerning. Thanks for the heads-up, Osoro.  
\- no problem, demon girl. wouldn't wanna see u hurt. if anyone tries to hurt u kick them up the ass, k?  
\- I’ll try to keep that in mind :) 

From: Ayano Aishi, 11/3, 10:11 pm.

\- Hey! I didn't see you at school today. Are you feeling alright?  
\- You’re so sweet for asking :) yeah, I'm fine, just had a dentist appointment.  
\- That’s good, just wanted to make sure that Kizana's murderer didn't get you lol  
…not funny, Ayano.  
\- Sorry, I really didn't think that one through. So you’ll be at school tomorrow then?  
\- Oka?


	3. In which Budo decides to confess (or Bad Time 2.0™)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit longer than the previous two, so that's good I guess.
> 
> First draft, don't judge me, I'm tired :')
> 
> Trigger warning for graphic violence (badly written violence, but violence nonetheless). 
> 
> As always, thanks for reading and leave any feedback you feel is necessary! :)

Wednesday 13th March 

_"Why are you holding that thing?! What are you going to - AHH!" Oka's body collapsed onto floor of the Occult Club, blood pouring from the open wound on her stomach. ___  
_The murderer let out a harsh, hysterical cackle before picking up Oka's corpse and carrying her out of the room. Her expression was unintelligible, and she was twitching. __  
_"Oh my God, is that a -"__

Budo's uneasy sleep was harshly interrupted by the insistent beeping of his alarm clock. He fumbled around with his eyes closed, trying to find the switch on the side to turn it off.  
Oka.  
Was she okay?  
Was she alive? 

He reached for his phone.

Conversation start: 13/3 6:02 am  
\-- morning oka :) 

She replied a moment later. 

\-- morning budo :) 

Budo felt his face relax into an uncomfortable smile. Oka was okay. He was just being paranoid. 

But his smile froze in place as he remembered that Kizana's killer was still out there somewhere.

\-- did i tell you i'm planning on confessing to taro? 

Budo's grin became genuine. It was rare for Oka to sum up the courage to initiate that sort of conversation with somebody, and to be quite honest he was pretty sure Taro and Oka would make a wonderful couple.  
Better than himself and Taro anyway, he thought bitterly. 

"Sorry Budo. You're cool, but you're a little...how do I put this... loud? Energetic? Besides, my mum would kill me if she suspected I was dating somebody with an average of less than B+ across the board." 

He knew it wasn't right to hold Taro's response against him - he was a lovely person, just a little socially awkward - but that didn't stop him from having a slight grudge.  
Besides, Taro had plenty of suitors, and there was an abundance of cute people for Budo to keep his eye on.  
Like the boy who was currently texting him.

From: occult boy  
\-- did you do the math homework???? im actually dyign im scared im going to get a detention 

Oh Shin. Always eloquent and on top of things.  
Budo smiled to himself as he recalled the feeling of holding Shin's hand in his at the cinema the other night. Budo wasn't actually that afraid of horror movies; he just wanted to have an excuse to get Shin to hold him.  
He glanced at the clock. 6:09 am. He typed a quick reply to Oka before rolling out of bed.

\--no!?? when??! 

His father was already in the kitchen frying up something on the stove. The bright red kettle was boiling dangerously close to the frying pan.  
"Morning, Dad." Budo said with a grin and a yawn. He walked over and gave his father a kiss on the cheek. This was customary in his household.  
"Good morning, Budo." his father replied, not taking his focus off the eggs he was frying. "How'd you sleep?"  
"Not so well." Budo admitted. "I've been having nightmares ever since..."  
His father nodded sagely. "I hope they find whoever is behind her death. Kizana was a lovely girl, and her family deserves to watch her murderer face the consequences. I can't imagine what they must be going through right now... If it were you instead of her I don't even know what I would do." His father turned to him, and all the grief and worry and sorrow Budo had felt weighing upon him was reflected in his father's eyes, large and dark brown like his own.  
His father let out a small laugh. "Bit early for talk this morbid, eh? Would you like a cup of coffee?"  
Budo nodded. "I can get it myself-"  
"Don't be silly." his father insisted. "You made the tea and coffee yesterday. It's my turn."  
This was how things worked in his family. When Budo was staying with his dad, everything was divided equally between them. One day, Budo would do all the cooking, including tea and coffee, and his father would do the cleaning. Other days, Budo would clean and his father would cook.  
"At least let me make your tea, then." Budo replied with a grin. Just because it wasn't his turn to make drinks didn't mean he wasn't going to try.  
His father had done so much for him. The least Budo could do in return was make him a cup of tea.  
"Well, if you insist." His father gave him a tired smile, and Budo threw a teabag into his father's favourite mug before pouring in the contents of the kettle.  
Budo's phone vibrated again, and a glance at the screen revealed that Oka had typed a reply. He sat down on one of the stools at the counter before reading. 

\-- i was thinking friday at 6:00. y'know, the cherry tree myth and all. 

\-- i'm glad. you guys would make an adorable couple.

\-- haha

\-- not joking. i actually ship you guys. now that i think about it i don't actually ship anything else. does that make you my otp?

\--look, technically  
\-- but hey, budo  
\-- if you want us to get together that badly, i guess you won't mind if i raise a proposition? ;) 

\-- are you suggesting a threesome because i'm not sure i'm into that 

\-- what!? no!  
\-- i just meant that maybe i won't confess to taro until you confess to a certain somebody 

\-- oka wtf there are like ten other girls who like taro you gotta snap him up

\-- all the more reason for you to act now

\-- oka, he's straight

\-- nah he's gay af he just doesn't know it yet 

\-- i'm not really sure that's something you can say about someone 

Budo sighed audibly, warranting a response from his father.  
"You okay there, kid?"  
"Yeah, just Oka being Oka."  
"What now?" His father set a plate of eggs with toast in front of him and handed him a steaming mug of coffee. Budo gestured at the tea he'd made and left on the countertop. It blended in seamlessly with the dozens of dirty cups.  
It hadn't been Budo's job to do the dishes the day before, but his dad had other stuff on. Budo didn't exactly care about the fact that there were more dishes than usual for him to wash.  
"Oh, there's this boy I like and this other boy Oka likes and Oka's said she's not going to confess to the boy she likes until I confess to the one I like, except the one I like is straighter than like... a very straight thing." Budo explained, taking a bite of his toast.  
"Is this that Taro guy again?" His father sat down on the stool beside him, spraying crumbs on the counter as he spoke.  
"Oka likes Taro. So, understandably, I'm somewhat eager for her to confess before somebody else does. And Taro's bi, so it wouldn't be a problem if it were him." He took a massive gulp of his coffee, conveniently omitting the "loud and obnoxious" part.  
"Didn't that angry friend of his go missing, though?"  
Budo had to swallow quickly in order to reply, the coffee warming his throat on the way down.  
"You mean Osana? Yeah, that's a slight issue seeing as he was very fond of her. I don't know if he meant platonically or romantically when he told me though. He's not exactly the easiest person to decipher. I don't see what that has to do with Oka's confession, though."  
"He's probably grieving, Budo. Perhaps it would be best to advise Oka to wait a while for Osaji's disappearance to sink in a little."  
"Osana. And I guess I see where you're coming from."  
His father grinned. "Now, tell me about this boy you like."

***  
From: oka cola  
13/3, 6:57 am  
\-- so, you gonna do it?

\-- yeah, i guess so. you know it's not going to end well, right?

\-- ahhhh!!! when?  
\-- psst shin had a bad night so don't do it until like, lunchtime if you're planning on it today

\-- thanks for the heads up. idk i guess i'll just get it over with and do it at lunch.

\-- i'm still in awe of how cute you guys would be together

\-- oka we're not going to be together. shin is STRAIGHT 

\-- what straight guy holds hands with another guy

\-- one who is comforting his wimpy friend who is afraid of horror movies 

\-- right. "afraid." 

\-- if you blow my cover i'll kill you 

\-- all right, calm down. see you in class :) 

*** 

Budo sighed as he watched the clock tick, seemingly in slow motion. The seconds felt as though they were getting exponentially slower. It didn't help that all the characters on the whiteboard were making zero sense to him. How on earth was he supposed to remember the difference between 较 and 校？He already spoke English and Japanese. Why was he expected to learn Chinese as well? He turned to glance out the window, and caught Oka staring at her feet. He could just make out the pristine pages of her notebook, the perfectly neat characters planting a spike of jealousy into his stomach.  
Oka spoke Japanese without the twangy accent many of their classmates had adopted, her English was impeccable and her Chinese rivalled even Kokona's - which was impressive considering Kokona was half Chinese and had grown up attending language classes every weekend. It was difficult not to be jealous.  
On the other hand, Oka was terrible at math and often too shy to attempt to participate in class.  
While Budo's languages were terrible, he knew he could count on his mathematical ability to help him in his academics when nothing else could.  
He compared Oka's neat characters with the chicken-scratch scrawl in his own book. In his writing, he could hardly tell the difference between 爱 and 家.  
Perhaps practising his neatness would have assisted his ability to remember simplified characters.  
Budo let out a heavy sigh of relief as the lunch bell rang loud and clear. He didn't even put away his books before rising from his desk.  
Oka caught him on his way out the door.  
"Are you going to tell Shin now?"  
Budo nodded, defeated. "I guess so. Don't be surprised if it goes badly."  
She laughed, her dark eyes sparkling. "Don't be silly. I'm going to the roof. Meet me there after?"  
Budo gave a weak smile and nodded again before turning away.  
"Hey, Shin! Wait up!" 

*** 

The locker area was empty besides Shin and Budo. Shin's locker was wide open as he collected the books he'd forgotten to take to class before school, and his arms cradled his World History textbook as if it were a newborn child. The love between Shin and history was too pure for words to describe, in Budo's opinion.  
"What did you want to tell me, Budo?"  
_What did I want to tell him? Why am I here?_  
His nerves had decided to behave up until that point. Anxiety and nervousness overrode his ability to think, and he glanced outside to clear his head.  
He caught a flash of orange out of the corner of his eye. Something - someone - was walking toward the school's entrance. Their shoulders were slumped completely, and they trudged onwards in a manner that suggested utter defeat.  
"Shin..." Budo lifted his arm and pointed outside. "Shin, is that Osana?"  
Shin turned his head to follow Budo's gesture.  
"What the fuck?"  
They stood in silence as the figure approached. Shin quickly threw his books back into his locker and slammed the door closed.  
As they got closer, all doubt in Budo's mind dissipated.  
It was definitely Osana.  
Her hair was matted as if it hadn't been washed or brushed in a week. Her skin was the colour of sour milk, and her bones protruded cruelly from her skeleton-like arms. She lifted her head only briefly, revealing her eyes.  
They were what scared Budo the most. Those brown eyes, usually so full of life and vibrance, were dead and dull.  
Where had Osana been?  
What on earth had she gone through since her disappearance?  
Shin took a step forward. "Osana? What happened to you?"  
Her only response was a mumble, so quiet it was almost inaudible.  
That was the moment in which Budo noticed the glint of an object in her hand.  
He squinted. It was none other than the ritual knife from the Occult club. How had she gotten hold of that?  
He tuned into her mumbling.  
"Kill...kill...kill..."  
Fear set into his chest.  
"Shin, get back!" he shouted. "She could be dangerous!"  
Shin seemed to have noticed the knife at the same time Budo had, because he obeyed immediately. "Where the fuck did she get that?! And where is she going?"  
"I think we should follow her." He tentatively stepped over to Shin. Shin's breaths had become shallow and irregular.  
"Okay." he agreed. He reached for Budo's wrist.  
The unexpected contact made Budo feel as though his heart had jumped into his throat. He felt a surge of confidence, and re-adjusted so that it was his hand Shin was holding instead.  
A swarm of butterflies had taken up residence in his stomach.  
Bloody hell, not now.  
The two of them followed Osana up three flights of stairs, leading them to the roof.  
The roof?  
"Is she going to jump?" Shin thought aloud.  
"If she wanted to kill herself she would have done it with the knife before now." Budo pointed out. "I don't know what she's going to do." By this point he could feel his heart beating harder than ever. He wasn't sure whether it was because of the warmth of Shin's skin against his own or if it was fear of what Osana might do next.  
"Perhaps we should take away that knife."  
"I don't know about you, Shin, but I don't want it to end up in my side."  
Osana approached the corner where Sakyu and Inkyu Basu spent every minute of their free time talking. As usual, Oka was standing around the corner watching them.  
Budo had always wondered if she actually had any evidence to support her succubus/inccubus theory.  
Midori Gurin stood across from the three girls, eyes glued to her mobile phone. Ayano Aishi wasn't too far away from her, her gaze fixated on Osana. Her face was dark, and she seemed to be...twitching?  
Osana seemed to be making a beeline for-  
"Oka, move!" Budo shouted. He noticed Shin jump, and Sakyu and Inkyu shot him a glare.  
Oka simply stared at him blankly, not moving.  
She identified the emaciated girl before her at the same time the sisters did, and let out a shrill shriek.  
Sakyu darted forward, but Osana had already pounced on her prey. Oka's head hit the cement with a sickening thud, but her screaming was what Budo knew would stick with him.  
"Leave her alone!" Sakyu yelled, getting behind the orange-haired girl and throwing her arms around her waist.  
Osana thrust the knife into Oka's chest as if she was simply cutting a cake.  
Budo tried to move, but he was rooted to his spot on the ground.  
By that point, Midori had looked up from her phone. Her expression read "pure terror." Inkyu's was similar.  
Budo didn't even want to think about Shin.  
Ayano's face, strangely enough, was blank.  
The proceeding moment unfolded as if it was an eternity. Sakyu had let go of Osana, too shocked to move.  
Osana raised the knife again. Blood dropped from it, and Budo's perception of the world began to spin.  
Oka screamed as Osana stabbed her again, and again, and again. Blood poured from the open wound, forming a glistening puddle on the ground.  
Budo could see the three girls' reflections in it.  
Oka's screams were cut off, and she twitched before lying still.  
Everything drained from Budo's body. He blinked, but he wasn't waking up. He was only aware of the dull sensation of nausea in his stomach.  
Osana lifted the knife yet again, this time to herself.  
Budo didn't even have time to let out an "Osana, no!" before she had plunged it deep into her neck. A fountain of blood sprayed from the puncture, coating Sakyu and Oka in the red liquid.  
Osana's lifeless body collapsed on top of Oka's as the ritual knife clattered to the ground. Her blood mingled with Oka's.  
Shin threw up all over his feet.  
Sakyu stared at the aftermath of the scene before her.  
Ayano was still blank.  
Midori and Inkyu were frozen in place.  
It took a moment before Budo was able to speak. His heart was pounding like a jackhammer, and his head was filled with the relentless noise of alarm bells and Oka's screams.  
"M-Midori." he managed to stutter. "Midori, go get a teacher. Inkyu, call the police. Sakyu, go get yourself cleaned up. Shin, I'm going to take you to the nurse."  
Midori met Budo's eyes, a desperate pallor cast over her face. "P-please don't leave me alone."  
He looked across at Shin, who had turned white as a sheet and fallen to his knees. Their sweaty hands had disentangled themselves from one another.  
He looked as if he was dangerously close to throwing up again.  
"Can you walk?" Budo asked.  
Shin didn't answer. He stared at Oka's lifeless body.  
"Ayano, can you keep an eye on him?"  
The idea of leaving Shin alone with Ayano made him feel slightly queasy for some reason. He put it down to simply not knowing the younger girl very well.  
She nodded in response, and Budo set off with Midori to find a teacher.  
Neither one spoke until they reached the faculty room.  
"Dead? Lead me to them."  
The last thing Budo wanted was to go back up to that roof.  
What had happened to Osana to make her do something like that?  
What on earth could she have been through?  
And, more importantly, who had done it to her?  
When Midori and Budo emerged from the stairwell, the teacher hot on their heels, they were greeted with...nothing.  
The corpses had simply disappeared. There was no blood on the ground, and the knife was nowhere to be seen.  
Even Shin's puddle of vomit had been cleaned up. Shin and Ayano were gone.  
"If you think this is a joke, it's not very funny." the teacher said sternly before turning and heading back down the stairs.  
The two of them stood, unmoving, staring at the place where the nightmare had unfolded.  
"...They were right there..." Midori breathed before collapsing in a heap. Her shoulders heaved as she sobbed, and Budo simply sank to his knees so he could hold her.  
The bell rang to signal the end of lunch, but neither of them moved.


	4. In which Shin really needs a hug

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: self-harm
> 
> Hands up if you really want to just hug both the boys D:
> 
> As usual, thank you for reading and let me know if you enjoyed this chapter :)

Friday 15th March

Shin's eyelids felt as though they were made of lead. Leaving them open felt worse than salt on an open wound, but closing them was worse. He couldn't erase the sounds of Oka's screams from his head. The thud of her body against the cement of the roof. The sound of the ritual knife stabbing into her chest and over. The spilling of Osana's blood from her neck onto the ground.  
It had been three days. He hadn't slept. He hadn't eaten. He hadn't said a word.  
He had forty-five missed messages from Budo and Inkyu Basu. He expected that Sakyu and Midori would have been just as shaken up as him.  
But that's not true. Nobody knows how you feel.  
Osana. Amai. Kizana. Oka.  
Fucking hell. Oka.  
Shin hadn't cried.  
He hadn't felt much of anything, really.  
Oka's parents reported her as missing after she failed to return home from school. The police hadn't found her body.  
How could it have disappeared so quickly?  
Shin's mind began to wander as his eyes closed, and even as he drifted into an uneasy slumber he wasn't able to escape his memories.

***

_"What have you eaten today, Kizana?"_  
_"I-Oka, you have to understand-"_  
_"Kizana, have you eaten?"_  
_"...no."_  
_"Okay."_  
_"Okay?"_  
_"What's going on at home?"_  
_"My dad's in hospital again. Mother only narrowly escaped charges."_  
_"Kizana, your dad needs you alive."_  
_"I am alive, Oka."_  
_"Not for much longer if you keep eating the way you are now."_  
_"It's not that serious."_  
_"Kizana, you've lost fifteen kilos in less than six months. You're living off two hundred calories a day. This is serious."_  
_"I'm still functioning."_  
_"Kizana, I really don't want to watch you starve yourself to death."_  
_“Oka, mind your own business. I’m fine.”_

_"Would you like a brownie, Shin?"_  
_"Thanks, Amai."_  
_"Oka loves this recipe."_  
_"Yeah, she said that."_  
_"She likes a lot of my recipes."_  
_"Oka likes food in general."_  
_"Me too."_  
_"I know, Amai."_  
_"Do you think Taro likes cakes?"_  
_"Probably. Most sane people do."_  
_"Ayano doesn't."_  
_"Like I said: sane people."_  
_"Ayano isn't insane. She's a little...eccentric, but I'm sure she means well.”_

_The warmth of Budo's hand was a comfort. It made Shin wish he had a girlfriend so he could hold hands with people more often._  
_The illusion shattered as soon as Osana raised her knife._

_Kizana looked shocked for a moment before collapsing onto the stage, unmoving._

_Osana's dead eyes bore into Shin's soul._

***

"Budo, you've been extremely quiet the last couple of days. Are you okay?"  
Juku lay his hand on Budo's shoulder, intending to comfort him.  
The question was a complicated one.  
Was Budo okay?  
Oka screamed.  
Her body was gone.  
Nobody would believe his claims that she was murdered.  
For all he knew, Shin could be dead too. Midori had been reduced to an empty husk of her former self. Sakyu and Inkyu weren't even at school.  
No. He wasn't okay.  
He plastered a wan smile onto his face. "Yeah, Juku. I'm fine, just tired because of school. Homework, you know. Thanks for checking, I really appreciate it."  
Juku raised an eyebrow, and doubt was an ocean in his eyes.  
"What happened on Wednesday, Budo?"  
The martial arts master shook his head in response. "Nothing happened."  
"Where's Oka?"  
Budo exhaled sharply. "She's missing, Juku. It's not a good idea to push these issues."  
"I'm not stupid, Budo. I know something happened, and I'm not leaving you alone until you tell me."  
The fire in Juku's eyes sparked admiration in Budo's heart. Juku wasn't a strong fighter, but at least he tried hard.  
The prospect of informing him of the possibility that a murderer was loose in the school filled Budo with dread. There was no way Juku would be able to defend himself. And there was no way in hell he would be sharing what he had witnessed Osana do.  
Her whereabouts previous to the incident still perplexed him.  
"I care about you, Budo." Juku uttered, raising a hand to cup his cheek. "I want you to be okay, and I’m willing to do whatever I can to make sure you are.”  
The unexpected contact took Budo by surprise. The fact that it wasn’t particularly unpleasant surprised him further.  
“Thank you, Juku.” he said, lifting his own hand to cover his friend’s. His intention was to pull Juku’s hand off of his face, but instead he simply left it there.  
“Please, tell me what happened.”  
Budo dropped his hand and shook his head fervently. “I can’t, Juku.” he replied. “Can’t you just respect that I don’t want to talk about it?”  
The smaller boy sighed, taking his hand back. His eyes wandered and focused on a point in the far corner of the room.  
“Budo, I hate seeing you like this. You know I’ll never judge you for anything, don’t you?”  
Budo inhaled deeply.  
_If I tell Juku, he might react badly. I don’t want him to act impulsively_.  
“Oka’s dead.” he admitted.  
Immediately, a huge load felt as if it had been taken off his shoulders. The only people he felt he could confide in were those who had seen the murder take place, and he didn’t want to mention it to them. Telling Juku meant there was an outsider who knew the situation.  
“Shin and I… we saw Osana murder Oka with the ritual knife from the Occult club. She looked like she’d been through something horrible; her eyes were completely dead, and she was so skinny. I don’t even know what to think about where she’d been.”  
Juku’s full attention was back on Budo. His eyes searched for a hidden meaning in Budo’s words, some kind of ulterior motive.  
“You’re telling the truth?”  
Budo nodded. “Absolutely.”  
“So where’s Osana?”  
“Dead. She killed herself straight after killing Oka.”  
The bell rang loudly, signalling the beginning of class.  
Juku let out an elongated sigh. “You…why doesn't anyone know about this?”  
“Midori and I went to get a teacher, but by the time she’d gotten to the roof everything looked the way it had before. It was like… It was like nothing had even happened.”  
“Aw, man.”  
Sympathy had taken over Juku’s face, and Budo felt something snap inside of him. He had a sudden urge to punch his friend.  
“I’m so sorry you had to see that.”  
“I don’t want your pity, Juku.” he snapped.  
Juku flinched, as if Budo had just hit him.  
“I’m sorry, I-“  
Budo sighed. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to snap. I just… I’m sorry. I’m having trouble with… well, everything.”  
“Thank you for trusting me with this, Budo. I’m always here for you, okay?”  
Juku stepped forward and wrapped his arms around the martial arts master in what was supposed to be a comforting hug.  
The warmth of Juku’s body against his instantly calmed Budo. He had somebody to go to.  
Juku hadn’t been particularly good friends with either Oka or Osana, but his willingness to listen meant more to Budo than he could articulate.

Message from: Budo Masuta 14/3 6:22 pm  
— shin, how are you holding up?

Message from: Budo Masuta 14/3 10:35 pm  
— shin, i want to talk to you. i don't know what to do.

Message from: Budo Masuta 14/3 11:57 pm  
— hi

Message from: Budo Masuta 15/3 3:21 am  
— shin, you are alive, right? please tell me you’re alive

Message from: Budo Masuta 15/3 5:03 am  
— will you be at school today?

Message from: Budo Masuta 15/3 3:31 pm  
— please talk to me. i’m worried sick.

***

The blue light emanating from Shin’s phone illuminated his face in the darkness of his bedroom. His clock read 3:03 am.  
Oka was gone.  
His stomach growled, but he didn’t react. He didn't deserve to satisfy his hunger.  
_She’s dead because of you. They both are. You could have stopped Osana, but you didn’t._  
The memories began to replay in his head again.  
_Am I going insane? Why won’t my mind leave me alone?_  
His eyes scanned the room frantically, searching for something, anything, to take his mind off the horrific scene he had witnessed.  
On his desk lay his old pen knife, a gift from his late grandfather.  
He dropped his phone onto his bed and crossed over to the desk in three strides. He set himself into his chair.  
He flicked the blade out from its cover, nicking his finger in the process. He tapped his desk lamp to turn it on, the dim light casting an ironically warm glow over the room.  
He pulled back his sleeve. His veins stared up at him.  
The frigid metal of the blade was a comfort to him as it sliced through the skin of his arm. He started with a small incision on the side of his forearm, a spot that would be covered by the blazer of his school uniform. Warm, thick blood welled out of the cut.  
He pressed the blade into his arm again, deeper this time. The pain brought tears to Shin’s eyes, and his vision became blurry as a result. But he didn’t stop.  
_You deserve this. You are nothing._  
He brought the knife to his skin over and over, until the pale skin of his forearm was covered with criss-crossing cuts. Dark red blood acted as the finishing touch to his artwork.  
_You are worthless._  
He pulled the sleeve of his other arm up over his hand and dabbed at his self-inflicted injuries.  
He didn’t feel any better, but at least his mind had settled.  
He climbed back into bed and closed his eyes.

***

Conversation start: 3:05 am, 16/3  
— Juku, are you awake? I can’t sleep.  
— yeah, i’m awake.  
— Do you mind talking to me for a bit?  
— anytime, budo. what do you want to talk about?  
— Anything except what happened.  
— did you hear about pippi and ryuto?  
— Are they finally dating?  
— yeah. it’s about time, too  
— Tell me about it.  
— budo  
— Yeah?  
— do you have a crush on anyone? which girls take your fancy?  
— I’m not really into girls.  
— oh.  
— What about you?  
— i like both  
— I meant do you have a crush.  
— oh. yeah. i don’t really want to say who it is though.  
— Taro? haha  
— no, not taro

***

Saturday 16th March

For Ayano, Saturdays were boring as all hell. She usually didn’t bother with her homework; the only subjects she really cared about were the ones that were applicable to her life.  
A glance at her cork board coaxed a smile onto her otherwise empty face.  
“Maybe this week will be the week Senpai becomes mine.” she said aloud.  
Her phone lit up.

From: Info-chan

— Asu Rito is returning to school this week, and she likes your Senpai.

Bloody hell. Was a break really too much to ask for?  
_What to do this week?_  
Avoid Budo, Shin, Inkyu, Sakyu and Midori, for a start.  
Maybe crushing Asu to death would be fun?  
_Oh, it’d be hilarious if she drowned, seeing as she’s training to be an olympic swimmer and all._  
Best to stick to something else for now. Too many deaths would make people suspicious. Besides, she’d had her fun. She grinned as she remembered watching Kizana’s lifeless body flop onto the stage, and relived the feeling of triumph that had followed.  
Maybe I could start some sort of rumour about Asu? Steroids would be a believable one.  
She typed out a text to Info-chan.

— Are you able to provide me with some potent and illegal steroids?  
— Consider it done for ten panty shots.

Ayano sighed as she sent them across. She wasn't a huge fan of peering up girls’ skirts to take photos of their underwear, and she wasn't quite sure if it was appropriate to use Oka’s, Osana’s, Kizana’s or Amai’s, but she was willing to do whatever was necessary for her senpai.  
Still didn't mean she had to like it. Even a sociopath needs standards.  
She grinned to herself as Info-chan confirmed the transaction.

— They’ll be waiting for you on Monday behind the school.

***

“Shin, honey, maybe you should see a counsellor.”  
Shin’s mother sat at the head of the table, taking small sips from a steaming mug filled to the brim with coffee. Shin gave her a glance on his way up the stairs, holding his own cup of coffee.  
He looked even worse than usual. The bags under his eyes were a dark shade of purple, making him look as if he’d come straight out of a fistfight. He was already starting to look skeletal due to his lack of food.  
Shin took a moment to humour his mother, then shook his head and continued up the stairs.  
He felt like absolute shit. His mouth was fuzzy and his hollow stomach growled. His arms felt like Satan himself had decided to rub them with salt. He was surprised it was even possible to bleed as much as he had and not die from blood loss.  
He was tired. So, so tired. But every time he closed his eyes he just saw Oka. Her laugh, her smile, her death…  
And sometimes he saw Ayano. He knew, logically, that she had had nothing to do with the whole scenario — after all, as Amai had said, she was simply slightly eccentric — but for some reason he was unable to put his finger on she seemed a little…off.  
He didn’t particularly want to close his eyes again, just in case.  
His muscles ached.  
_You deserve to feel like this._  
The messages from Budo had stopped. His phone hadn’t given him a notification since Budo’s last message. The silence left a gaping hole in Shin’s heart.  
If he really knew you, he wouldn’t want to be friends with you.  
Upon reaching his bedroom, Shin collapsed onto his bed. He didn’t sleep, instead gulping down his coffee and positioning himself to spend another day staring up at the ceiling, lost in his thoughts.

***

Conversation start: 9:00 am 16/3  
— hey  
— Hi Juku  
— how’s ur weekend?  
— How do you think  
— shit  
— sorry man i forgot for a sec there  
— wait, how have they not found the bodies.  
— I don’t know. Can we talk about something else?  
— if you want. hey could i get some advice  
— About what  
— there’s this boy i want to ask out but i’m afraid the timing is wrong  
— What do you mean  
— i mean he kinda went through something bad

Budo’s heart felt like it had stopped. Did Juku mean Shin?  
The thought of Shin’s name alone conjured an amalgamation of emotion into his being. Equal parts fear and worry, but mostly longing.  
Longing to hear from the boy he… never mind.  
Was Shin okay?  
What a stupid question. “Was Shin alive?” would be a better one to ask.

\-- Things seem bad at the moment but eventually he'll feel a little better. Wait until then.

_Or wait forever._


	5. In which Shin is emo af

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long to upload! I'm on school holidays at the moment, and have spent the majority of this week recovering from a particularly nasty case of burnout (and a cold). Sorry for the lack of quality of this chapter, but I hope it's enough to tide you over until the next one :)  
> Ooh, big announcement! Well, not big, but big for me. We've surpassed 150 hits, and honestly while that's not a lot for most people, for me it means a hell of a lot! To know that this many people have viewed my content, whether they enjoyed it or not, just... fills my heart with rainbows (A+ to you if you understood that reference)! So thank you for reading this. Your support means so much to me!
> 
> As usual, leave any feedback/criticism in the comments. Sorry in advance for breaking every Masugaku shipper's heart (including my own). 
> 
> Also, I have no idea why there are so many paragraph breaks. Blame Pages.

Monday 18th March 

 

The walk down the school driveway felt like a funeral procession, and Shin felt like a zombie.

How could everybody be so happy when such terrible things were afoot at the school? 

It didn't take long for him to notice that Asu Rito was back. A small crowd had gathered around her: a few Martial Arts members, a couple of the drama kids and, of course, the sports club.

Shin wanted to spit at them all. How dare they be so bright and cheerful when Oka was dead?

"Shin!" Upon hearing his name, Shin turned. 

Budo had approached him, his arms outspread to offer a hug. Shin stared blankly in return.

How could he be in such a good mood?

"I was so worried about you." he said, pulling Shin into a bear hug despite his lack of a response. 

Shin did not hug back. 

The physical contact made him want to vomit.

"Get off me." he said shortly, his voice rusty and hoarse due to lack of use.

_You don't deserve to be cared for._

“Shin?"

Out of the corner of his eye Shin realised his sleeve had scrunched up to his elbow. He pulled it back down hurriedly and brushed Budo off just as easily. 

Except it wasn't easy. 

_You don't deserve a friend like him._

He had to keep reminding himself of that fact to prevent him from turning around and running back to him to apologise. 

_You don't need friends._

Instead of heading to the occult club, Shin ran straight up to his classroom. The door was unlocked, which wasn't unusual at that time in the morning; his teacher was somewhat forgetful in that regard. He set himself up at his desk, having organised all his books before realising he’d forgotten to change his shoes. 

_You fucking idiot. You can’t even remember a simple thing you do every day._

His head began to spin. Why had he even begun to think that he would be able to try school again? 

He should have stayed home. 

_Oh, and what would you have done? Stayed in bed and cut yourself?_

_Shut up._

_What, so now you're telling yourself to shut up? What are you, a freak?_

_Yes. I’m a freak. Now be quiet._

Shin took a deep breath in a futile attempt to calm his nerves. 

_So, what are you going to do for the next hour? Idiot._

 

***

 

Budo stood in his usual spot in the martial arts room that morning, but no matter how hard he tried his mind kept wandering back to Shin and his reactions that morning.

Shin had seemed so... 

Budo wasn't sure how to describe it. He was obviously going to have suffered some emotional trauma; all the witnesses would. But Shin had acted as though it was Budo himself who had committed the murder. He sighed, earning an inquisitive glance from Juku.

"I'm going to go get some fresh air." he announced. "Mina, you're in charge until I get back."

She nodded. "Right!" 

Budo slipped through the door and headed for the stairs. 

A figure darted past him, her shiny black ponytail streaming behind her.

_Ayano?_

She stopped suddenly upon spotting Budo and gave a polite smile. "Good morning. Have I caught you at an inconvenient time?" 

_Inconvenient..._ His head was spinning, memories and thoughts and half-formed hypotheses overlapping and contradicting one another inside his mind like the waves of the ocean during a storm.

He set his mouth into a confident smile. "No, it's fine. What can I do for you, Ayano?" 

_She was there she was there she was there she was there she was there-_

"I was wondering if I could join the Martial Arts club? The incident a couple of days back shook me up a fair bit, and I want to know how to defend myself if something else happens." 

Budo couldn't refuse her. He'd always had trouble saying no to new members: it was his duty to ensure students were able to adequately defend themselves.

But Ayano... something seemed off with her. She seemed less on edge and twitchy than usual, but it unnerved the martial arts master nonetheless. 

"Sure! Glad to have you." he replied, trying to sound confident despite the fact that he felt as if he was slowly drowning in his own thoughts. "All we ask is that you show up at least once a week." 

Ayano gave Budo a grin, but to him it seemed forced, lifeless.

_She's been through just as much as you have. She's probably scared shitless._

His raven-haired underclassmen walked off toward the club, most likely to go train with the others. For some reason it put Budo on edge, but he tried to squash it. 

_Stop being stupid. She’s harmless._

He continued up the stairs, doing his best to control his breathing and heartbeat. 

The mood upon his arrival was somber, grief and fear draped over the area like a particularly thick and suffocating blanket. 

Midori stood in her usual spot, glued to her phone like always. But her expression was one of pure panic, and her signature green hair was tangled and dull.

_She's seen three deaths now._

Even though it wasn't quite true — she hadn't seen Amai die, after all: she'd simply been the one to discover her note — the thought struck Budo with the intensity of a truck full of bricks. He gave her a wan smile once she looked up.

Inkyu and Sakyu stood in their corner, but like Midori they were both shaking, faces deprived of any kind of joy or hope. They spoke in hushed, fast tones. 

_What am I doing? This is the worst place to go to calm down._

Budo tried to take a deep breath, but his lungs were suddenly made out of iron. 

"How are you holding up?" Midori laid an ice-cold hand on his arm, having walked over while he was distracted. Budo simply shook his head in response. 

"Don't worry about me. It's you and Shin who I'm concerned about." 

Midori let out a shallow sigh. "Do you think anyone would be okay after that?" 

Budo glanced at her face. In three days she had aged seventy years. Her once-sparkling eyes were duller than graphite, and her smile was gone. 

"I haven't slept in a week, Budo." 

"Me neither, Midori." 

Budo reached out to cover Midori's hand with his own in an attempt to comfort her. His own hand was slightly warmer than hers, and much larger. The effect ended up being reminiscent of a slab of ice being placed on top of a smaller slab of ice.

"I don't want anybody else to get hurt." 

"Me neither, Midori." 

"Who's doing this?" 

"I don't know." 

"We need to find out." Midori looked so lost, so helpless in that moment that Budo couldn't resist wrapping her in what he intended to be a warm hug. His own coldness probably made it feel more like being mauled by a polar bear. 

"It's gonna be okay." he promised. "We're gonna be okay." 

Midori sniffed before stepping back from him. "How's Shin?"

_Get off me!_

"I don't think he's doing so great." Budo felt his heart crumple like a piece of paper about to be discarded at the recollection of that morning. 

_I need you to be okay, Shin. Well, not okay. But functioning, living... please, Shin._

Midori gave a wan smile. "That makes sense." 

Budo returned her smile and exhaled fully. "I don't know what to do."

"Just give him time." Midori turned to face the Basu sisters, the pair of them having sat down on the ground, cross-legged and facing one another. Inkyu had pulled her hair back in to a messy bun, emphasis on messy, rather than her usual sleek pigtails.

"Time... yeah, okay." 

The green-haired girl took Budo’s icy hand in hers. “It’s going to be okay.” she said, but it sounded as if she was trying to reassure herself more than him. 

Budo gave her a half-hearted smile. “We’re going to be fine.” 

 

 

***

 

Message received: 2:01 pm

— Excellent! Now I have a picture of Kokona Haruka’s panties. I owe you one. 

— Speaking of owing me one… do you have any dirt on Asu Rito? 

— Ha! The girl’s nothing but a safe full of dirty secrets! 

— So is that a yes? 

— You’re going to love this. I’ve got a video of Asu planting thumbtacks in her opponent’s running shoes. Enjoy. 

— You’re the best! 

— I know. 

 

Ayano grinned at her phone before she set off running down the stairs. 

“Hey, Asu! Wait up!” The blonde was a fair way ahead of her, but Ayano was determined to consolidate their budding ‘friendship.’ She would not waste a single moment that could be spent gaining Asu’s trust.

Her new friend turned to smile at her. “Ayano! How’re you? Thanks again for finding my goggles, you’re a gem!” 

“It’s really nothing.” 

 

*** 

 

_You’re worthless. You’re nothing._

“Shut up!” 

Shin sat at his desk, head down. The voice in his head drowned out any semblance of logic or positivity. 

His only company was the collection of desks scattered about in the classroom, and the untouched bento box his mother had made him take for lunch. 

_You should just die._

“SHUT UP!” 

The door slid open, and a head poked in. 

“Hey, stop being mean to — Wait, Shin? Who are you talking to?” Ryusei asked. 

“Mind your own business.” Shin mumbled in response.

The blue haired fuckwit took a step toward Shin. “Are you okay?”

“Piss off, Ryusei.”

“Dude, I—“ 

“I said fuck off.” 

Ryusei shrugged and turned. “Jeez man, just trying to help.” 

Something snapped in Shin’s head. He launched himself out of his chair bounded toward Ryusei at a speed he wasn't even aware he was capable of. 

His fists moved without his permission, and next thing he knew his knuckles were coated with a thin layer of thick, warm, blood. 

Ryusei clutched his nose as he crouched on the hard ground. “What the fuck, man!” His voice was muffled by his hand, which was quickly becoming coated in the liquid. 

_Dark red blood bloomed on Oka’s ripped school shirt…_

Shin felt his stomach lurch. 

“Oh my goodness, I didn’t mean —“ 

_Shin glanced at his own reflection in the glistening mixture of his friends’ blood…_

Ryusei glared up at him. “I was trying to be nice!” 

The sour sick burned Shin’s throat and mouth as it forced its’ way up. It landed straight in the other boy’s hair. 

_How am I vomiting? There’s nothing in my stomach to even throw up…_

His stomach and throat howled in pain as he vomited more bile up and onto the ground. 

_Oka Oka Oka Oka Oka Oka Oka Oka_

His vision blurred, but whether it was from tears or faintness he wasn't sure. 

_Budo ran downstairs. Ayano set him on Inkyu and Sakyu’s bench before disappearing around the corner…._

“Shin Higaku! This kind of behaviour is totally unacceptable! This school has a reputation to uphold! You are going to have to face serious consequences!” 

Shin’s vision turned black. 

 

***

 

The school was alive with gossip. Budo had barely had a conversation all day that hadn't been all about Asu Rito’s return, or Shin’s suspension, or Osana and Oka’s disappearances.

Even the after school Martial Arts activities weren’t free from it. Sho made a joke about steroids early on, and apparently that meant it was appropriate for everybody else to continue the joke. 

Budo, however, was more concerned with his friend. 

_He got suspended?_

_Wait, no, of course he got suspended. But… He punched someone?_

The Shin he knew would never hurt a fly. 

The Shin he was… 

_No._

Shin had changed. 

_The Shin I’m in… no. Don’t say things like that so lightly._

Was it just a regular way of showing grief? 

_What are the five stages of grief again? Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance? Maybe he’s just displaying regular signs of anger._

Juku glanced at him through his peripherals and shot him a sympathetic smile.

Budo smiled back before sharing his next instruction. 

“Budooooo, it’s 5:30. Can we leave?” Mina whined. “My legs hurt….” 

“It just means you're getting stronger.” Budo said, trying to adopt his regular enthusiastic tone. “But Mina does have a point. You can all go, we’re done for tonight!” 

The students filtered out one by one, leaving only Juku and Ayano. 

Juku gestured at Budo. “You can go first, Ayano. I’ll be a while.” 

The small raven-haired girl smiled warmly. “Thanks. Juku, right?” 

Juku nodded. 

Ayano turned her attention to Budo. “Three things. Firstly, thanks for letting me join the club. I really feel like I belong, y’know?” 

Budo nodded. A warm feeling spread through his chest. This was why he’d started the club in the first place! “I’m really glad to hear that, Ayano. I started this club hoping that everybody could feel as if they belonged.” 

Ayano smiled, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. For some reason, her half-hearted attempt at happiness planted a shard of ice in Budo’s mood. 

_You’re being ridiculous._

“Secondly, how can I improve?” 

Any lingering shreds of doubt dissolved entirely as his face relaxed into an easy grin. “I’m so glad to hear that you’re eager to get stronger! Honestly, just practice the stuff we’ve been doing. Make sure you're eating well, and staying fit. And, like I said, you're welcome to come spar with us any time. If you want some private coaching once you’ve got the basics down we could probably organise that too?”

Ayano nodded eagerly. “Thank you so much! Well, that’s it from me. Have a wonderful night!” 

Budo smiled. “You too, Ayano. Don't work too hard, I wouldn't want you to get hurt!” 

“I won’t!” 

She left, leaving just Juku and Budo. 

The moment the door closed, Budo let his mask fall away. All of the anguish, the guilt, the fear he had hidden away in the back of his mind manifested itself on his face and in his posture. 

Juku immediately ran forward to envelop him in a warm, welcome hug. 

“Bad day?” he said softly. His breath felt smooth against Budo’s neck. 

Budo simply nodded in response. “I don't know what to do.” He could feel Juku’s heartbeat against his skin, and the steady beats gave him an anchor for his thoughts. 

“It’s going to be okay.” Juku assured him. 

Budo buried his head in the smaller boy’s shoulder, feeling his heartbeat and breathing speed up. 

_Oh shit. That’s what happens to me around Shin._

_Oh fuck. What have I done?_

He jerked up quickly and jumped back from Juku. 

“Budo? Are you okay?”

“I — you can’t like me, Juku!” 

“Huh?” 

A bright red blush spread over Juku’s cheeks. “I… what?” 

“Fuck. Did I fuck up?” Budo felt his own face heat up. “Shit. God, I can be an arrogant fuck sometimes…” 

“No, no, you’re right, but what?”

“Juku, I’m a mess.” 

Juku held out a hand and lifted Budo’s chin to meet his own eyes. 

“Anyone would be after being through the things you have. Besides, I don't mind mess.”

Budo exhaled. 

_Tell him you like someone else._

“Okay. I’m sorry.” he said. He took a step forward. 

_What the fuck are you doing, you idiot?_

_Shut up, okay? I just… I just want to feel less alone._

_But just before you were talking about being ‘in love’ with Shin! Last time I checked, that boy in front of you is Not Shin™._

_™? Really? I have got to spend less time on Tumblr._

Budo lifted his hand and rested it on the back of the other boy’s neck. 

“Thank you for being here for me.” He leaned forward until their foreheads touched. He could feel Juku’s breath on his lips. 

Their lips met.

Budo felt nothing. 

 

***

“Drugs?! Not only is this against school rules, it’s also illegal! I hope you know that this is going to have serious consequences!” 

“No, I swear, they’re not mine!” 

“You’re lucky this isn't going on your permanent record. This school has a reputation to uphold, and you're one of the primary bearers of it!” 

“I don’t know how they got there! I would never —“

“I hope this is the last we have to speak of this, Ms Rito. Have a good night.” 


End file.
